Blog 19 Holiday Reflections

Page 14

During the holiday season joy and loss seem to be more on our minds as we reflect on the value of our connections past and present. Our gatherings and celebrations can open our hearts and thus our emotions to both being in the present and reflecting on the past.

 Sometimes we do our best to only glimpse at our losses rather than feel the depth of our grief. I feel we can find a deeper place of meaning by being with loss and talking about it as on our hike.

 Loss being inevitable we can consciously choose an attitude through our being present to the experience. Although painful there is always a teaching moment if we allow the totality of the experience to be felt. When we face the depth of our own experience there comes a deeper wisdom.

My good friend Mark Ruskell (DC) was a good friend and colleague who I had known from a men’s weekend years prior. We were part of a men’s team for years. He came to our usual team meeting at the park. He sat down at the table and teared up as he told us he had cancer. We were all in shock as we had always held him as being the big old farm boy who could physically endure anything.

 He went through a series of progressive and aggressive treatments for esophageal cancer.

 I visited him at home the week before he died.

I found him dressed and appearing to be well despite having fasted for many days. We talked about life and death and he focused on all his positive life experiences. I watched him reviewing the video of he and his girlfriend’s dive with the manta rays in Mexico. He raised an empty margarita glass from their trip and said “I have no regrets”….essentially saying from a life well lived.

I grieved his loss And I was present to his message to Live a Life with No Regrets. Thanks Mark! I love you brother.

Holiday blessings and may you be present to all the gifts that may come to you emotionally during this holiday season.

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