Blog 29 Being Alone and Belonging Continued (Gary)

Page 42 (Fox kits coming down the hill to see me- priceless)

I have seen a number of men who drink together in a work or after-work situation as a way to self-medicate and feel connected.  One of my favorite stories is of a high level corporate guy and ex-special ops academy graduate.  He was in sales where drinking was part of the protocol.  He got a DUI and it woke him up.  I coached him and he began his recovery process for himself and for the sake of his family.  He was a drinking buddy to a lot of other men.  One of his first concerns was how he was going to tell them.  How was he going to not drink in front of them or not join them in drinking?  I supported him to man up and lead those men.  I suggested that he and he alone had the courage and balls to do that—and he did.  Last I heard he was doing very well in sobriety and had gotten a number of his colleagues and veterans to either stop drinking or at a minimum brought them into a greater awareness of the damage it was creating.  “How do I quit?  Everyone I know drinks like I do.”  I have probably heard that one a thousand times.  It was extremely gratifying to have him call me over a year later, as traffic to his work diverted him by my office, and he thought to call.  I had been thinking about him and he called just to let me know things were great for him and he was continuing his life of sobriety.  What a gift!

            Our culture is so very _______ due to shame and guilt and too many medications to deal with it. Let’s risk opening our hearts and go much deeper than beers and a ball game.

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